Getting better!

It was all done and I am getting better. I was scared to undergo a mastectomy. Yet, in my innermost mind, I know, I am lucky to get timely treatment.

The surgery was done on April 3rd, and I was sent home in the afternoon. 

Our parking lot is a walkable distance from home. But, after major surgery, I was unsure about my ability to reach home safely. So, we rented a wheelchair from MeadyReady. They delivered it at home on April 2nd. It was a real blessing! 

There is a community clinic near my home, to give nursing care. The doctor arranged it for me. So, I was asked to go there to check the dressing two times per week. 

The first week was difficult. I was sleeping most of the time and was very tired. Even emptying the drain tube was taking a toll on me. The second week was better. I was walking inside the house, without much help. The drains are out. It still hurts, but I don't have to take pain medication as often as the week before. 

I am very thankful for the care I received. Mentally, I still must go a long way to accept the changes. Many are telling me "It could have been worse... You don't have cancer...You are still alive..." etc. The intelligent part of your brain is accepting that. Yet, the emotional part of you still feels overwhelmed. The body you had for all these years is not the one you have now. 

Am I too selfish to feel the sadness? Am I being too cruel to the people around me with my tears?

So many doubts... Hopefully, this will also pass. 

 

Bindu